In order to be able to heal or do healing work, we need to be present and have a felt sense in our bodies where we are safe.  This safe place is where our truth is, which is that we have always been safe, all we are is love and we are connected to every living thing.  Our task then becomes, how to remind ourselves of who we are.  The following exercise does this very simply.

1. Sit in a chair and notice the chair underneath you.

Feel the support of the seat, the support of the back and how your body responds to that connection.  This allows you to bring all of your energy into the present moment.  Whatever you are feeling in your body is just right.

2. Notice your breath coming in and out.

This deepens your connection to your body, your truth and the present moment.  Let your exhale be longer than your inhale – this calms your nervous system.

3. Notice where in your body you feel safe (or comfortable) and breathe.

The important part is that you notice where you are safe and from that place to notice what is going on in your body and your life.

You don’t need to figure anything out, just notice if you are present or not and what that feels like.  If you discover you are not present, then really lovingly, just go back to feeling the chair underneath you, then your breath and where you feel safe.  It is from this safe place that you can know and speak your truth.  It is from this place you have choice.

This is a very simple exercise that will change your life and reprogram your cells!

1. Breathe gratitude into your heart.

Take a few slow deep easy breaths (with the exhale taking longer than the inhale.)  While inhaling, imagine as fully as you can that you have gratitude coming into your heart and filling up your entire body.  Enjoy the feeling!

2. Speak out loud what you are grateful for.

After you have inhaled gratitude, pause for 2 or 3 seconds and then speak out loud what you are grateful for in your life.  Notice the vibration of your voice move through your body as you say what you are grateful for.  Enjoy the feeling!

3. Repeat.

Practice this at least once a day for 5 minutes and in a short time you will notice changes in how you think and how your body feels.

These are 4 questions to use when you are faced with a challenging interpersonal situation and are not sure what to do.

I have used these 4 questions since 1980.  During difficult times, I carry them with me on an index card because I find it easy to forget them in the heat of things.

1. What is my responsibility in this situation?

This is asking if what is happening right now is my responsibility (did I do something to contribute to or cause it).  If the answer is no, I just let it go and be supportive of the other person.  If the answer is yes, I move on to question 2.

2. What can I do about it?

If for example, I made a mistake and hurt someone’s feelings, I could decide that calling up the other person and apologizing would be a good way to make amends.

3. When can I do it?

I might not be able to call or see the other person right away, so I could decide that next Monday I will call the person and apologize.

4. How can I be more gentle to myself in this situation?

This is the most important question and step of them all.  If I have decided what is mine, what and when to do something to make the situation right, then all that is left is to forgive and be kind to myself.